“Only trust someone who can see three things in you: The sorrow behind your smile, the love behind your anger and the reason behind your silence”
I woke to Phil Collins this morning singing against all odds and a deep pain in my chest
Today is my Earth day
A time when the planets aligned and my mother’s prayers were answered
That’s not conceited
We were all called here for different reasons
The sound or voice would have resonated from the Earth and through the body of a guardian we would have been born.
That’s how I choose to see it anyway
Over the last two years this day has become very surreal
To celebrate my creation without my creator is the most unexplainable phenomena
Instead it is currently the hardest day of loss for me
Something can not be born without an ending
Here I remember who I am and why I am here, by missing the very blood that made me possible knowing I am not judged for these tears of love but seen and held
I am blessed, always have been, literally from birth.
Not only by a vicar as my survival wasn’t guaranteed, but in truth way before then when my beloved said yes to carrying me
For choosing me.
I never stopped trusting her or that connection
No matter how much I miss her, the love I would have given will be in what I gift to others, in this we will continue to create and grow together eternally
Against all odds, even endings
This morning shuffling the Tarot, feeling the Strength it has taken to keep going as I randomly selected from behind the Page of Swords, I tuned into the unknown image in my hands
Feeling my mother immediately, I recieved from the Earth herself ” your prayers are heard, speak of your wishes, let them become your truth”
My throat closing over from fear, breathing I let go of all doubts, concerns and worries held by my mother on all levels I breathed my wishes into the now obvious Ten of Swords.
Underneath it all sat The Queen and three of Cups
Today go against the odds
You are here for a reason
What you long for is part of that
Make a wish
Let go of anything that isn’t in it
Hold your creations as any creator would.
Without judgement but trust
May we see all things thrive the eyes of Pachamama, potatoes included, only here will we truly remember what we are here to create.
In deepest munay