“Nothing in the Universe can stop you from letting go and starting over”
Except perhaps ourselves?
This morning I have woken feeling awful.
Facing the second part of THE cleanse prior to my bowel procedure, on the day of Thanksgiving, I am in truth finding it hard to locate my own gratitude.
More than ok.
It’s my current truth.
Being aware of this alone, I know the process will shift, when the time is right, but also there are deeper insights, within everything I feel, to be found.
I’m nervous this morning.
Of the actual procedure.
The last twenty-four hours has seen the return of hidden memories.
Held within my energetic body.
From past experiences.
Allergic reactions from drugs that my body didn’t want.
Being held down, whilst I screamed to leave, after given the adrenaline needed to counter act these.
Extreme pain from pushing a dislodged camera against an adhered bowel.
Myself, witnessing it all, from outside of my body.
Holding space for all of these messages, I found myself reflecting over the last day.
So much has risen to be seen.
A cycle of shadow work.
The lessons don’t change, but WE as the teacher and students can.
Starting with painful realisation, we must complete with the medicine.
In every moment, by feeling into what has occurred.
My own came this morning with a promise.
I could relate to the energetic cause behind my dis-ease, karmically, Ancestrally and my own role within in.
A bitter pill to take, but like the laxative I had struggled to down, necessary.
Now, for the changes, the recognition I am not the same version of myself anymore, the traumas are there, of course, but they are family now.
Part of me.
A promise of balance.
They have, like all pain, helped me to deliver a deeper awareness of who I am.
My purpose, to witness the raw emotion of the Divine Feminine, within myself and for others as needed.
I could do this, have been doing this, most of my life.
At times in the very centre of it all, swept away in the confusion of transference, abuse, and gas lighting at others completely separate, dissacociated from all emotions.
I have found a third way, a combination of them both.
To feel and heal.
By doing what I do best.
Hold space with no Judgement, including the version of me that reacts when restricted.
Shuffling the cards, or dividing them, I felt cold as I selected from behind myself, The Queen of Wands and tuned into the unknown image.
I hadnt picked it up, I didn’t need to, in fact I continued to write in my journal, all the while aware of the energy beside me.
This was a great skill of mine.
To be aware, feel, gain insight and remain detached from the situation.
I could sense the presence of The Ten of Cups, not here, but coming as a result.
Feeling all of my energy centres spinning within themselves, cycles within cycles, aware of a high Angelic vibration as my third eye and heart began to expand and join, I asked for a message.
Finding myself elevated so high yet grounded I received “ it’s going to be alright” and this in reality, was all I, we, ever need to know.
The card was the Wheel of Fortune, beneath which sat the Three of Swords and the Ten of Cups.
Today connect to your Spirit.
Hold court for everything you feel as the channel of this.
Allow it to cause a reaction within you.
Without supressing it or holding it down.
Too often we are guided to be of this World but not in it, yet it is being present in the body that delivers the Medicine required.
May we all let go of the dis-ease of detachment, the trauma this causes to ourselves and each other and re-discover the change we all long to witness.
#tarot #change #soulmidwife #sacredwitness #ascenscion #healing #sacredspace #observation #2022 #trauma #grateful