The whisper’d tale
That like the fabling nile
No fountain knows:
Fair sacred deceit
Whose wily conscious eye
Ne’er looks direct
The tongue that licks the dust
But when it safely dares
As prompt to sting
What story are you reading this New Moon?
I am literally and metaphorically listening to the tale of “Big Magic” by Helen Gilbert and “Untie the strong woman” by Clarissa Pinkola Estes- but also reading my own internal chapters.
Do you have the courage, to bring forth the work- the treasures that are hidden inside you, hoping you will say yes.
It seems I, like many of us, have been on the same page for some time in one way or another.
“Stuck” almost as and with the Fool energy.
Ready to walk our talk but unaware of what voice truly lies within us.
Leaving many “hanging” not only on the advice of others but to the past unable to step into the Magician they always were.
The Shaman- The final ceremony- started in 2012- for the collective.
You can’t re-invent the wheel, but you can put your own spin on it.
Our own Tale and the pain it causes
Something many of us will find being brought to light in relation to this last super New Moon in Scorpio- prior to the Eclipse season!!!
On so many levels.
The turning point in the life of those who succeed usually comes at the moment of some crisis.
We are indeed at the “turning point” of a dark descent.
For those aware there seems to be a regular pattern, a woven story line into the very fabric of time itself that has begun to lose its appeal and narrative.
No longer a sacred offering
The battle between “good” and “bad” the dark and the light the Masculine and the Feminine has become a tiring, unnecessary reflection of the internal war.
With many refusing to lay down their arms and step into the peaceful warrior of the heart.
This, ironically, becoming the very thing that causes us the pain needed to finally surrender.
Our own crowning!
Pain is physical. Suffering is mental. Beyond the mind there is no suffering. Pain is essential for the survival of the body, but none compels you to suffer. Suffering is due entirely to clinging or resisting. It is a sign of our unwillingness to move on to flow with life.
Sri Nisargadattor Maharaj
My own coronation came after I had finally had my operation!
Having been cancelled three times.
The night before all Hallows Eve, I found myself in ceremony.
A familiar one.
The journey to the Dark Goddess.
Bathing, surrounded by my Ancestors.
Partaking in cacao medicine
Healing and releasing all expectations with sound and fire.
I was ready to literally “go under”
What I discovered upon waking however not only surprised me but gifted me many hidden treasures.
Discussing with the anaesthetist it appears my physical vessel has been in trauma.
For over a decade.
“Experiencing” an extreme auto immune dis-ease, unable to take medicine, my body has been in a semi-permanent state of continuous pain.
This was not something I did not know and work with, but in truth I had never felt the vision I was aiming for.
Not in reality.
In my mind, peace.
My heart, dreams, hopes, always.
My physical body?
Finally receiving analgesia, I knew, albeit briefly, what it was to go beyond my own suffering.
Fear is the memory of pain, addiction is the memory of pleasure, freedom is beyond both.
Now, two weeks later, anything that isnt of this energy merely causes more discomfort to my Soul.
For I know it isnt my truth.
Like the sacrifice which has become the essence of Death, desire, pleasure- rebirth-within us.
The Hero’s journey to discover that he or she had the power within them all along through trials and tribulations.
Is a farce!
This lie, deceit, game of whispers, seems to have one theme in common.
For our “sins”
Until someone, somewhere, takes us down from the branch of chapters within our own family tree.
Not by adding more material, genetic or otherwise, but removing what is no longer needed.
The venom within the blood and waters of life.
Something we as a family unit are experiencing greatly at present.
Backwards and forwards between what people know and what people say regarding the care for my mother, she has finally surrendered and taken time out.
Taken control of her own decisions.
People ask me what sacrifices I have made. I always answer I have made no sacrifices I’ve only made choices.
Aung San Suu Kyi
Much like Pachamama she has made a choice to be with what is occurring.
To understand and witness her pain.
Like us all right now.
“She” is in recovery.
In a hospice.
Treated like the Sovereign being she has always been.
This has allowed us time, to face our own inner fears.
Something collectively we often avoid with distractions.
But eventually the voice, her calling, becomes too loud and we either go willingly or kicking and screaming!
This time of year brings a great opportunity to go within, to our darkness, our internal winter and find the light waiting at the end of each tunnel, whatever that may be.
But it takes something else, another treasure I found during my own journey.
The most important freedom is freedom from our own judgement.
The ability to witness.
With no judgement, where we are and our feelings about this.
Necessary if we are to align and create something different be it our own manifestations or the awareness of others.
Post-surgery, under the assumption of the head nurse, I was declined pain relief.
Seeing the words CBD ( a legal extract of cannabis) on my chart- a product actually advertised in the hospital- it had been decided my “allergies” were a result of wanting more extreme measures.
That I was a “drug addict”, despite having paracetamol for childbirth and unable to tolerate alcohol!
No longer seeing me, my procedure, my body, or the very evident discomfort I was in, they had left me to my own devices.
A room so built to do anything but
The news of so many deaths on the TV, related to hospital admissions none the less!
My body went into overdrive.
Fight or flight
The pain increasing I could almost feel my pupils dilating as I did something I normally avoid.
I expressed her.
The only person who is deeply holding you back is you. No more excuses. It is time to change. It is time to live life at a new level.
The Dark Goddess within me, still in the Underworld of the hazy General anaesthetic effects, I began to roar with pain.
The searing fire in my just sliced and diced womb.
Standing, leaning over a table, for all to see, I let “rip”
No longer being “brave” I had become Inanna, hooked up, skin tearing, face to face with Ereshkigal.
Allowing my body to speak
Breathed as it laboured each stage of the injustices being projected upon me.
My emotions became my bread and water, bringing me somehow back to life.
My pain had become my sacrifice.
On so many levels.
Reaching for a throat lozenge, I was greeted with the “staff” yanking my bag from my hands demanding to know what I was “popping”
Upon stating the legal sweet in my hand, I needed to do nothing else.
But show my reaction, not hide it, stand in my truth.
What is worthy that you will actually devote yourself to giving rather than getting
The silent understanding in a room full of the Feminine spoke volumes.
We, women, destined to care, nurture and be Midwives for the Feminine had restricted her, individually and collectively on so many levels.
Immedietley I felt “her-story” seeing the results around me
The lady opposite, having calmly accepted her terminal diagnosis in front of us all with no privacy finally began to sob.
The young girl next to me undergoing number “way too many” obstructions in her womb almost shivered
The TV blaring repetitive “statistics” silenced to an advert for body form: https://www.bodyform.co.uk/our-world/why-our-wombstories-need-to-be-heard/
Everything, for a moment, paused.
We were her.
All of us.
We be-longed to the w-OM-b stories: https://www.facebook.com/events/390116722356872
Discharged rather rapidly I felt surprisingly calm.
To be going home.
To an environment that was supportive, warm, dimly lit so I could relax and be nurtured, create the same sensation I had with the relief of pain.
Familiar, glorious, well-earned I felt sure this would be a pleasant experience.
This was not the case.
Become an alchemist. Transmute base metal into gold. Suffering into consciousness. Disaster into enlightenment.
Returning I gained responsibility, painfully, having to claw myself back from the pit of despair on several occasions.
Not from my mother, who I decided to visit daily despite healing myself and as a result crashing my van upon a rather larger mound!
From “Eve” I gained respect for my healing abilities and faith
Not from my sibling with whom many deep loving conversations were had to empower us both.
From my sister(s) I gained the beauty of grasping each moment of precious life.
Not from my brother, having found a shadow on his brain, being treated for radiotherapy.
From “Adam”- my masculine actions- I gained certainty over the doubt in my mind- my “why”
Not my “cross bearing Simon”- grieving husband, or the loss of his own mother and instability regarding employment.
From my union I discovered my ability to carry the be-loved and trust in my balance.
Not from my “sun” who had decided he was going to move out.
From my creations I realised they were ready to be shared when matured.
Not my offerings, our online group ever building to weekly video’s Tarot readings, creative space, and separate teachings from its members: https://www.facebook.com/groups/200334081120129
From here I realise I may well soon need to move forward in my studies and own spiritual growth, giving and receiving more of my blood and body.
Not even my accesible cousin, Lauren, “learn” for short whom I have just discovered has been rushed to intensive care waiting review having tested positive and been affectected by the Corona virus.
For whom I dedicate this article to.
From her teachings I have discovered that it is not our dis-ability that defines us but the strength we gain from the lessons.
But for myself.
Real transformation requires real honesty. If you want to move forward get real with yourself.
I am so many things in one: https://kirstydignam.co.uk/
Like us all.
But ultimately, I am me.
The “first woman”- of this life anyway
Embarking on my own arrival, I need to commit to the journey with all I have.
To find my own “turning point”
The very thing that will always direct me out of the Underworld of the old story.
I need to respect and dedicate myself to… myself.
Surrendering to everything I am, including the martyr.
The Mother, the sister, the wife, the healer, the daughter- the Feminine.
From here- we realise these are indeed all colours of the same coat, and can birth our own Dark Goddess: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5RakisRkC0
The shaman within us all.
She/ I/ we have much to speak of regarding this New moon.
A calling I share with you now:
The game of whispers and deceit is over.
The darkness has become the light
The very thing hidden has surfaced for all to see.
Be it shame
There is no hiding from this internal mirror now.
The Lack of light within all, from handing over power is and has been the ultimate Sacrifice.
It is time to reclaim it.
The accountability declared; none are forsaken.
This is the old testament!
There is a new Pope arriving next year and “she” is to birth the great “sun” in us all.
But first it is time to “go there” into the unknown, without familiar maps that have left many lost.
Beyond what was
Past what isnt
Through to what is
Squashed down a very, for some, tight, almost unforgiving, birth canal, guided to use the very forces and traits of the pain within to contract and deliver the legend that will play out next year and for generations to come.
The teachings have been served, for many over huge mounts!
The Dark, descended, High Priestess that has found the answers within unity not duality and birthed her Empress self into the very lessons now being taught.
How to hold space
“Bearing witness” for all.
The role of the Great Mother.
Look at what is being conceived.
With the focused purpose, intent and self-mastery of every transforming, alchemising Scorpio.
The Mother wound is coming to an end, the story of Adam and Eve within all is changing.
Many are reconnecting to the truth that not only was Eden here all along beneath the feet of those searching.
But that they too are the very serpents come to remind each other of this!
By exploring what leads so many to engage in the associated yet often hidden behaviour this new moon will illuminate the unconditional love required to heal.
The addictive patterns, judgements, beliefs so many hold on and project onto others.
It is these poisons that are to be eradicated from the “system” now
There is deep wisdom within our very flesh if we can only come to our senses and feel it.
Elizabeth A Behnke
This third and final supermoon feels almost like a baptism of fire on a deep emotionally healing level.
An opportunity to sit with ourselves and feel.
It is up to us to release or “re-live” the pain of carrying so many versions of our truth.
What a teacher is, is more important that what he teaches.
By merging all we have discovered over our paths especially since 2012 we are being faced ultimately with one final descent.
Something I will be offering as a separate re-treat in December.
The Journey to the Dark Goddess.
Not to stay, as so many have, but to finally return to the here and now applying all we have discovered to life.
To regain the original crown.
Not the corona ( crown in Spanish) vaccine
Not the Painful doubt of thorns and sacrificial sins
Not even our own “fruit” for the Dark Goddess
But the acknowledgement of responsibility
We are here to “right” the Story!
We are the sting in the tail!
This awareness of the bigger picture is brought so wonderfully in alignment with Jupiter’s involvement this New Moon, the last time we will see such Union in our lifetime.
It is all a question of a story. We are in trouble now because we do not have a good story. We are in between stories, the old story, the account of how we fit into it is no longer effective. Yet we have not learned the new story.
It is NOW we are finally able to break free of limitations.
Especially our own!
Giving the Scorpion within us all permission to metamorphose into the phoenix it has always been.
The snake with wings
The third eye inner sight of the seer
Heaven on Earth
The vision needed to keep striving forward beyond the pain
A woman is full circle, within her is the power to create, nurture and transform.
Diane Marie child
The reclamation of our own Sovereignty can only be realised in truth by completing the circle of any learning.
In-bodying and teaching the lessons discovered to and for others.
Last night in a free collective healing ceremony in our group: https://www.facebook.com/events/457262868578390
I found myself eaten by a snake.
The original sin complete.
My story has a new ending.
Having finally with guidance released contracts, karma, and Ancestral curses in today’s daily ceremony: https://www.facebook.com/middleagedmadwoman
Supported on Friday the 13th by the Goddess in all her forms, I am ready to lead others into the light of what 2021 can bring.
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story
A novel beyond what we have known, read, or heard.
Freedom past any ties on ANY version of the always strong Feminine
Outside the separation and suffering.
No longer fighting ourselves or each other
Looking at the thoughts behind our actions- Our shadow masculine
The result of our connection to the myths within us and the dis-ease the wounded Feminine can now heal
The ledgend of creation itself
Having studied my own “great book”.
This New Moon I recommend the same for us all https://www.facebook.com/events/364778611270140